


A Road Trip

by orphan_account



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Bucky Barnes Feels, Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Spoilers, Driving, M/M, Post-Serum Steve Rogers, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Road Trips, Steve Rogers Feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-04
Updated: 2016-05-04
Packaged: 2018-06-06 08:06:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6746083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky and Steve are sat in the front of the Beetle as Bucky drives. Bucky comforts a grieving, tormented Steve, and then they both reminisce. </p><p>CACW spoilers!</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Road Trip

**Author's Note:**

> * - signifies a jump in time from pre-war to during CACW (But after the kiss).
> 
> I hope you like it!

‘I wish we could just get a car from somewhere and just drive it. Just us, getting out and having an adventure.’ Steve whispered, cuddling closer to Bucky in bed. It was so cold that his words materialised in a thin, white smoke.

Bucky sighed into Steve's hair as he pulled him closer to try and stop his shivering. He didn’t have to tell him the many, many ways that would be impossible. He knew that those impossibilities were flitting through Steve's brain as he thought of the idea - but he just elected to ignore them.

Bucky smiled at how Steve’s brain worked. How he could just ignore the likes of things being impossible - as they both shivered in the small bed. ‘Maybe one day, Stevie.’

*

Steve sighed, and started bouncing his leg, agitated.

‘Do you want to take over, Steve?’ Bucky whispered, pointedly.

They had been driving for a few days in the Beetle. Bucky had no idea where Steve'd picked it up, but he liked how it drove - much better than some of the newer cars, in his opinion. And just seeing it amongst some of the glares of the modern world made the tension in his shoulders ease a little.

Bucky was grateful to Steve for picking out the Beetle, so even though they had a driving schedule while they each got some sleep - Sam was currently snoring softly in the backseat - Bucky often asked to take a few extra shifts, if only to give his mind something to focus on. And he didn't like sleeping too much.

‘No. It is my shift, though.’ Steve whispered back, but Bucky could tell by the conflicting emotions that flashed on Steve's face that he wasn't telling him everything.

‘You know I don't like sleeping much. You can take over if you -’ Bucky started to say, softly.

‘No, it's fine. Thanks Buck.’ Steve sighed, shifting in his seat and rubbing his eyes. ‘I've just had a long few days.’

Tell him about it. Only yesterday had Steve nearly jeopardised their entire operation by taking time out of the meeting where they would obtain their now illegal “weapons”, or suits, to kiss the blonde Agent. Bucky was annoyed at how Steve would so easily spend a second longer there, and risk getting them all caught. Yes, that's what he was annoyed at, he thought, as he stretched out a smile and pretending to nod approvingly so that Steve would smile back at him. All thr while forcing down a poison that had crept up his throat. He wanted to seem happy for him. He was happy for him. But then again, he also wasn’t.

‘Yeah… She seemed nice.’ Bucky offered, genuinely meaning it. She did seem like a nice girl. And an efficient agent, bar what happened earlier.

‘Mm’ was Steve's only reply, as he turned to stare out of the window, pain obvious in his voice.

‘What's the matter?’ Bucky offered, tempted to take one hand off the wheel so that he could grab his hand, or touch his shoulder, or something.

‘I'm just thinking.’ Steve said softly, still looking at the deep blue sky that blurred past the closed window. You could tell he was doing more than thinking. Bucky didn't know too much about Steve yet, but he knew a man beating himself up when he saw one.

‘About the girl?’

‘Mm.’

Jesus Steve, he was trying to help! Bucky sighed and turned to stare at the road instead.

‘It's not… she's Peggy’s neice.’

‘What, Peggy - the Peggy?’ Bucky had read enough about her at the museum to know how much she meant to Steve.

Steve nodded, jaw clenched. ‘Yeah’.

‘Wow.’ Bucky didn’t really know what else to say.

‘I mean - it's not like we hadn't met before.’ Steve whispered, the inner torment dripping from his voice. ‘She made a lovely speech at Peggy’s funeral the other day.’

Bucky had to stop himself from yanking the steering wheel in shock. ‘What the Fuck, Steve? You kiss her a few day's after her about aunt - the love of your life's - funeral?!’

‘I know’, Steve whispered, nodding towards Sam, still snoring in the back, to try and Bucky to keep his volume down. ‘But I called her earlier today, while you were both sleeping, and we talked about things. We agreed that while things could work one day, that know just wasn't the time for either of us-’

Bucky nodded. Say what you want about Steve Rogers, but he was caring, and - most of the time - he was smart.

‘The kiss was just a stupid mistake… Especially after Peggy-’ Steve struggled to get the words out, and wiped his eyes furiously with the back of his hand. You could feel the grief and pain emit from him, and Bucky's chest felt like ice at the sight of Steve like this.

Screw it. Bucky thought, and he took one hand off the wheel to hold Steve's shaking hand in his own. ‘It's okay, Steve. It's okay.’

Steve nodded wordlessly through tears, and squeezed Bucky's hand appreciatively. ‘I just, loved her so much.’

‘I know’. Bucky whispered back, quickly letting go of Steve's hand to wipe away a few of the hot tears from his face, and then grasping his hand tight again. He looked at those eyes, swimming in tears, and suddenly a flash of a memory hit him. A younger Steve, battered and bruised, crying not - due to, but because of, pain and cruelty, even though he felt plenty of both himself. Bucky was always there to comfort him, and for once he thanked HYDRA for the what they did to him, just so he could keep being there for Steve.

After a while of them sat like this, Steve breathed deep and wiped his eyes with a sense of finality, as the tears stopped. As he let another, stronger breath go from his chest, it felt like he was pushing out some of the pain with it. Just a little.

‘Thanks, Buck.’ Steve whispered, saying much more with his eyes.

Bucky nodded, and watched his friend out of the corner of his as he then turned and stared, wondrously, at the road in front of him, as if he could see something amazing in the road that he couldn't. The confused but bemused smile on Bucky's face at this was enough to get Steve to offer an explanation.

‘Do you remember when I wanted us to have a roadtrip when we were about 16?’

Bucky felt a glimmer of the memory unlock in his brain. The excited longings of his friend, his breath coming out as smoke because of the cold, both of them shivering but Steve's mind conjuring up a bright, warm adventure.

‘Yeah, I do’. Bucky said, smiling shyly. Steve smiled back as he started drawing patterns on Bucky's palm with his thumb.

They both looked out at the long, open road ahead of them, full of pain and fighting and God knows what else. But then, looking at each other, they wordlessly agreed that it was all worth it. Every bit of it. Because they had each other.


End file.
